Memories of Malawi

I went to Malawi this past February. I went alone. I didn't know who would be there other than Philippe Van den Bossche, director Raising Malawi. I didn't know him personally and I certainly didn't know what to expect.

I stayed at the Kumbali Lodge, a private family-owned farm. This is the car they sent to pick me up. How cool! It set the tone for the whole trip.

The Lodge was a dream. Majestic room -- striking because of the huge white bed net draping down from the ceiling. Private balcony. Big bathroom. Home-made everything fresh off the farm. I could have stayed at the lodge the whole time and had an amazing vacation. But that's not why I went.

I came to see where exactly the funds we sent to Raising Malawi were going and to decide for myself if this was something I could/should continue to put my energy into. I was lucky enough -- or fated, or something -- to make friends with Janja, one of the producers down there getting an update for the charity. She invited me to join her on most of her interviews, so all I had to do was wake up at the crack of dawn and tag along.

On my visit, I experienced some of the saddest conditions and circumstances of my life – I choke up just thinking about them.

And yet, I am deeply inspired by the progress we’re making in real time.

I watched orphan care centers and feeding centers being built. That's Janja and Kevin getting an update.

I watched women and children pumping fresh water from a borehole we installed for the nearby peri-urban village. I met hundreds of curious children delighted (and sometimes frightened) to see a "Mazungu" (white person) in their village.

I met hundreds of sweet little orphans with not a single toy to play with -- nothing but each other, but happy and managing all the same.

I witnessed a lot full of children who walked barefoot tens of miles (yep) in the cold and sometimes pouring rain in tattered clothes only to wait hours in line for a ration of food – a heavy bag of grain to carry on their pea-sized heads all the way back home.

Typically, this burden falls to children because their parents can’t do it. One is usually sick or working. The other is usually dead.

That's Nathan on the left. He was down there to make a documentary for Madonna. It was his fifth? sixth trip? I forget, but he has been on assignment there for a long time. He's almost a local. People know him by name. He was very cool, and seemed to care as much about the people of Malawi as he did about getting his story.

On this day I did everything in my power to keep myself from a public display of upset. I wanted to scream! It was one of my first days on the trip and I felt so compelled to hug, help, warm the littlest shivering children -- give them my jacket, sarong, money, something! But I didn't, under strict counsel.

There are just too many of them. And because I was with the Raising Malawi crowd, I had to play by their rules of engagement.

Besides, you can’t just give a child a jacket and stop the cold. You can’t just throw money at a problem and expect it to go away.

Raising Malawi proposes to not only address the basic human needs for survival, but also build out the infrastructure so that survival will no longer be a daily concern.

I walked through a cornfield we helped to fertilize that yielded enough crop to feed 850 more children than the year before.

I met people who inspired me to be a better person. Smiling children who taught me to smile more. Grateful people who reminded me to be grateful for all I have. Strong men and women who shattered my ideas of what deserves drama. Dying mothers and fathers who showed me how much I complain. It makes me embarrassed to think how much I still need to learn. But I am learning, and for that I am proud. And very grateful to the people of Malawi for giving me so much of what I don't already have.

I ended my trip with a big shindig at the Lodge with new friends, great food and live Malawian music. It was a trip to remember and one that will stay with me forever.